Monday 20 September 2010

Come to my dream...

Mummy has been very busy lately, writing the book I told you about. So although I didn't write here last week, I was writing about you, Billy buuz. Mummy is finding a great comfort in writing and motivated to do this book. It's Mummy's Master's and PhD. This would be so much more worth than any degree. Mummy will have a written history for you all, my babies. It will be there written down about us, Mummy's childhood in a rural place in Mongolia, hauling water from spring, dragging sheep in both hands, milking cows at moonlight and dreaming of chewing gum. You see, you made Mummy very brave and Mummy decided to do things to make a difference for others. Although, Mummy is still finding it hard to talk about you. I do want to and I do talk about you all the time. Mummy burst into tears the other day when I started talking about different projects in hospital, trying to encourage people to donate more. The projects they were talking about were all related to you and your sister's stay in hospital. So Mummy felt emotional and felt as if we lost you yesterday. I didn't think we will get over you ever, but only can find a way to handle our feelings. Mummy still expect other babies around your age to be about 3 months all the time. I forget that they are getting older. You will always be 3 months old in Mummy's head. Mummy hopes that you are pain free now. Mummy loves you dearly. You are Mummy's good baby boy, come and visit Mummy in my dream. Miss you and love you, Billy buuz. Mummy's fairytale hero with golden chest and silver bottom. XXXX

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