Mummy felt that I can stop writing the blog here and get on, but it was incredibly hard not to write here. It was almost like another grief, Mummy was struggling to find words to describe how I was feeling. I felt like a glass that is shattered into million pieces and ready to collapse with a tiny bit of touch. Mummy felt like falling down on my knees and have a loud sobbing cry, felt my chest getting tight and needed big deep breaths. So Mummy is just going to write here as before and get things out of my chest. So that it doesn't make Mummy feel down too much.
Your brother's nursery did well, they raised £560 already from the Bear Hunt and we are waiting to get the amount from the toy stall and the cans. This morning, you brother and I took them to Yorkhill. We asked if it could go to the Intensive care unit for more toys there. When you were really poorly, they didn't have enough toys and Mummy and Daddy were really upset that even before you died we wanted you to listen to children's music at least. You were kept asleep, so you couldn't really see things anyway, so it would have been nice to have something to listen to. One of the cardiac nurses got you a nice toy from her ward, which was nice. Mummy and Daddy think about you a lot. We got a card today for all of us including you, so Mummy's pleased that people remember you. Perhaps they noticed we sign their cards with your name. Mummy'll go now and see your brother's nursery concert, Mummy will thank everyone for their effort and the donation for Yorkhill there. They did well. Love you, Billy Buuz. X