Wednesday 1 December 2010

Somewhere over the rainbow...

Hallo, Billy Buuz. Mummy has been well, but teary recently. Mummy is Ok in general, but has a sudden rush of feeling missing you, overwhelming. Mummy's tears are very easy to come out these days. Mummy went to a Psychic night, hoping you might 'come through' and 'talk' to me. I don't know why, but I go and hope to be in touch with you somehow. Mummy was moody because Mummy wasn't happy that you were not here. Mummy's baby boy should have been here in Mummy's arms, but we've got your clothes, books, toys and pram. Mummy turned to your daddy and said: Billy realy is gone, isn't he?! Mummy still has this feeling hoping you're there somewhere. Your daddy got 3 advent calendars for you three. Your sister's got The Simpsons, your brother's got Santa and his reindeers and yours is the one with Winnie de Pooh. Your brother opened it today and it was little chocolate Christmas tree, so he put it in front of your photo. Your sister was looking at your little nail clippers and found a tiny nail. It must be yours, so she carefully wrapped it in a little plastic bag and put it with your locks of hair in the little gray bag with blue Teddy on it. Mummy felt Mummy should have kept your last clipped nails, Mummy didn't know that it was the last time Mummy was cutting your nail. Mummy didn't think that that was it, once you were buried that was it. Mummy and Daddy held you when you died in our arms and your hands got cold last because were were holding you and the heat trapped between our hands. Mummy didn't want you to turn cold, but you got so cold like a stone the next day. When I kissed your forehead at the funeral director's Mummy realised you were gone, your body wasn't good enough for you. Mummy and daddy still go to the cemetery and light candles. Our red headed angel boy, love you loads. XXXXXXXXXX

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