Hallo Billy. Mummy started this blog post a while ago and keeps coming back and then something happens and not finishing it.
How do you cope? How do you get up in the morning? These are the questions we are asked a lot. Mummy and Daddy have to get on with our lives and look after your siblings. We don't want your brother and sisters to remember sad childhood. We know they always remember you and talk about you, we will never forget about you. At the same time, we want them to enjoy their childhood just like other kids. You would want that too. You would want us to be happy and do well.
After all everyone has their problems, sadness and they have to find ways to cope, manage their feelings. Mummy noticed life is more meaningful if you live for others. It does not mean you tell people that. You help and support people who need that little support. You might be surprised how it makes you feel. Mummy heard someone on the radio talking about heaven and hell. The story was: In hell people were struggling because they were trying to feed themselves with very long spoons. In heaven they had the same spoons only they were feeding each other and they were happy. Mummy likes that story a lot. It says so much about happiness, support and friendship. Mummy told your brother and big sister that story. Your brother was very interested and it made him think. Now he gives the bigger piece of chocolate or anything he likes, he offers it to the other person. He is going through exploring age. The other day he asked 'What does selfish mean, Mum?' Mummy explained and he said he doesn't like the word selfish and he wants to be kind.
Uh-uh your baby sister is waking up now. She has been a good girl. She loves her food, she started feeding herself. It's funny though half of the food is on the carpet and half on her face. We'll get there.
Billy buuz, baby boy. We love you. The anniversary of your death is on Friday. Mongolian New Year is on Wednesday. Mummy and Daddy might give it a miss this year. It's a bit close to your anniversary. We will see some friends and have a modest time. Mummy and Daddy can feel our hearts becoming heavier as the day approaches. But what did Mummy say in the beginning? We have to get on with our lives, we will never ever stop loving you and light candles for you. Our beautiful baby boy.
Mummy wrote about you in a magazine for additional support needs and the link is here. It's called Three Months into Forever.